What if the way you respond to conflict in your relationships is connected to what you learned about relationships as a child?
In this episode, Susan Chesnutt sits down with Tamara Harris, a licensed clinical social worker and Florida Supreme Court mediator, to explore how childhood experiences, trauma, emotional regulation, and unresolved patterns can shape adult relationships and co-parenting.
You will hear how recognizing those patterns can help you respond differently, communicate more effectively, and keep children from being caught in the middle of family conflict.
In this episode, Susan and Tamara Harris discuss:
Childhood experiences and adult relationships
Trauma, attachment, and emotional responses
Therapy and breaking unhealthy patterns
Co-parenting and parallel parenting
Parenting coordination and family conflict
Key Takeaways:
[0:04:45] Children Learn Relationships By Watching Them – Creating a home with safety, love, healthy boundaries, and positive relationships can shape how children understand relationships as adults.
[0:09:45] Look Back Before You Move Forward – Examining childhood experiences and the environment someone grew up in can reveal patterns that continue shaping relationships and behavior.
[0:22:50] Breaking Patterns Starts With Recognizing Them – Identify unhealthy family cycles, recognize overlooked red flags, and seek support to understand which patterns you do not want to carry forward.
[0:38:25] Structure Can Make Co-Parenting Easier – Consistent rules, emotional regulation before communication, and shared schedules can give children stability while reducing conflict between parents.
[0:45:37] Parenting Coordination Keeps Children at the Center – Creating a roadmap for schedules, activities, holidays, and the child’s needs can help parents make decisions based on changing family circumstances rather than ongoing conflict.
“Our story begins in childhood. And so, it shapes like where we go into our adult relationships.”
– Tamara Harris
About Tamara Harris: Tamara Harris, LCSW, LICSW, QS, specializes in high-conflict divorce, parenting coordination, mediation, and rebuilding after relationship trauma. With more than 20 years of experience in child welfare and behavioral health leadership, she brings extensive clinical and systems experience to helping families manage conflict, repair communication, and protect children through family transitions. She is a Florida Supreme Court certified mediator, Collaborative Law certified, and an Internal Family Systems-trained practitioner licensed in Florida, Massachusetts, and Utah. Tamara also holds an MSW from the University of Central Florida and is pursuing a PsyD in Behavioral Health Leadership at Walden University.
This episode is sponsored by Guardians for New Futures (GFNF4Kids), an organization dedicated to supporting the unfunded needs of abused children while increasing community awareness and education to further protect kids. To donate, get involved, or learn more, visit www.GFNF4kids.org.
Connect with Tamara Harris:
Website: https://envisionstrategicconsulting.org
Email: tharris@envisionstrategicconsulting.org
Psychology Today: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/therapists/tamara-d-harris-palm-bay-fl/921467
Connect with Susan:
Website: www.thechesnuttlawfirm.com
Podcase: www.thechesnuttlawfirm.com/podcasts
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/susan-chesnutt-27077bb9/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thechesnuttlawfirm/
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCuBwfp_IVpeX-YHKpxZ5L0g
AVVO: https://www.avvo.com/attorneys/32960-fl-susan-chesnutt-3330241.html
Connect with GFNF4Kids:
Website: www.gfnf4kids.org
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/guardiansfornewfutures/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/gfnf4kids/
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/gfnf4kids
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCu1YDp4Qn1WxpEs1s1Oqktw